How Mediation in Can Help in Divorce
Someone somewhere said there is no such thing as an amicable divorce. But separation and divorce work better when you can agree on things.
Getting a court involved should always be a last resort. It can prove expensive and the court’s decision may not be the one you want. In reality, it may not be the one either parties want. It’s costly too and arguing over the value of a television may end up costing more in legal fees than the item is worth.
But it happens when two people get to warring.
This is where mediation comes in.
What is Mediation?
Mediation gives you the chance to have more control over the arrangements following on from your separation.
Mediation is part of a legal process during separation and divorce. You and your ex-partner get help to resolve issues using a professionally qualified mediator to help you. The mediator is neutral and helps you make arrangements during divorce over things like parenting arrangements and money. These are often hugely emotional issues and can make it difficult for separated couples to come to an agreement.
If you need mediation, you’ll normally have between two and six sessions. You may need legal advice too, and have your solicitor in the sessions with you. In most circumstances a court will need to see evidence of you having attended mediation, or the initial assessment meeting and it being determined that mediation isn’t right for you, before granting a divorce. Make sure to have your family lawyer present in every hearing to back you up with everything that you need in court.
If you go to court the judge makes the decisions, whether you like them or not. A mediator can help you resolve a situation and look at circumstances from a different perspective. Mediation helps with issues, such as assets and childcare arrangements, but can help with extended arrangements regarding step-families and grandparents too.
Mediation Initial Assessment Meetings
The first step is a Mediation Initial Assessment Meeting (MIAM). It helps determine if mediation sessions are right for you (for example, you may have already reached an agreement and both be happy and don’t need further mediation) and the mediator can report to the court that mediation isn’t necessary.
The meetings can be carried out with your ex-partner, or separately. But if you choose to attend together, the mediator will also speak to you both separately too.
Is Mediation for Everyone?
It’s likely you’ll be requested to try mediation or at least an initial meeting if you go to court and haven’t attempted to do so.
But there will be certain circumstances where mediation isn’t possible, for example where there is an allegation of domestic abuse or where a person is at risk.
On reaching an agreement your mediator will write a Memorandum of Understanding so that everyone can see what’s been agreed. It’s not legally binding but can be made so in court, as a Consent Order.
If the circumstances change the parties can return to the mediator to have the agreement changed. If a legally binding agreement is not being met, it may still be worthwhile to try a mediator before taking court action.
Divorce is a tough time and mediation can really help when the mudslinging starts. It’s always going to be cheaper than going straight to court, and there’s a better chance that you’ll get closer to the outcome you want.
